Episode 26 | Hannah
In this episode, Hannah shares her experiences of becoming a mum and how those three postpartum seasons ultimately shaped both her identity and her career.
After becoming a mum unexpectedly at 26, Hannah experienced significant anxiety around feeding and her baby’s weight, alongside the pressure to feel as though she was coping. As her family grew, she found herself increasingly trying to prove that motherhood hadn’t changed her - returning to paid work, pushing through exhaustion and trying to live up to an image of being a “superwoman”.
During her third pregnancy, while her dad was experiencing significant mental health difficulties, Hannah began experiencing intense intrusive thoughts around birth. She shares how frightening and isolating those thoughts became, and how speaking about them with her counsellor, sister, partner and midwife gradually helped her recognise them as thoughts arising from anxiety rather than intuition.
Hannah’s third postpartum experience was then profoundly shaped by the death of her dad shortly after Peggy was born. She reflects on navigating grief alongside caring for a newborn, the stigma and discomfort that can surround death secondary to suicide, and how that experience forced her to finally stop performing and allow herself to slow down.
We also discuss relationships after children, couples therapy, returning to paid work, matrescence, and why support doesn’t need to be reserved for moments of crisis.
Hannah’s own experiences eventually led her to train as a counsellor and establish a career supporting women through the perinatal period. She now runs her own practice and facilitates matrescence workshops, creating the kind of support that she wishes she had access to herself.
This is an incredibly thoughtful conversation about identity, anxiety, grief, motherhood, support and letting go of the pressure to achieve your way through parenting.
You can find Hannah and learn more about her counselling work at:
Instagram: @deep.end.counselling
Website: https://www.deependcounselling.com